Each time I even think of the word Landmark or the Forum I really do get a sick feeling in my gut.
Well in August 2002 my Husband attended the Forum. On the Sunday night he phoned me and we had an incredible conversation.
He told me where he had been "inauthentic," blah, blah, blah.
The next couple of weeks were even more incredible. I use the word "incredible," in the sense that what my husband was doing was just so very unlike the man I have known for 20 years. Remember, language can not be measured, Advanced Course.
He contacted every member of his family, friends, co-workers, and even former employers. And every single one of them he told how and where he had been "inauthentic."
Our own business began to experience neglect.
What topped everything off was that his sister was doing the SELP Course. And she got us enrolled and involved.
My husband experienced sleep deprivation, weight loss, grandiose thoughts, paranoia, incoherent speech, catatonic states and a loss of critical thinking.
After a couple of weeks of trying to get his family to see there was a problem, the in-laws all thought it was just me, they eventually started phoning back and saying, "What's happened to him and what's this Landmark"?
My husband's sister, who introduced us to Landmark, finally admitted it wasn't working for him. And agreed there was something wrong. We sought professional help.
It has been an extremely difficult time for us. I must say my husband's family has been very supportive through this process.
I believe Landmark makes a deliberate assault on your mind and people often become too zealous.
They control you from the moment you are in that room for the Forum.
Looking back now in hindsight, everything seems obvious.
I did The Forum in the fall and later took an Advanced Course, even though I had concerns.
That room we were in had no daylight, which can affect the mind. And all three days were like that. For 72 hours your internal clock is messed up and your mind becomes messed up too.
I have considered legal action against Landmark. My thinking is, when you go for an x-ray, they tell you there is an element of risk with radiation.
But with the Landmark Forum their written agreement waffles about mental health and disclaims any mental health problems that might arise as a result of participation.
It does not state that there may be a risk of psychosis.
They state they are not psychotherapists Yet, it seems to me that they go into the areas of a participant's personal life, where only a properly trained and credentialed professional counselor should enter.
They admit "there will be rigorous inquiries into your life, you may experience enthusiasm, excitement, happiness, sadness, grief," etc. etc.
However, that's just not specific enough.
Hey, you might experience such emotions watching Forest Gump or reading Anne of Green Gables--so what does that mean?
Actually "rigorous inquiries" means more than that.
What they don't spell out in specific detail is how you will be told to go back to your very bad first experience. And if you do not have an appropriate one, you are "skimping," "selfish" or whatever.
If people knew in advance how intrusive the Forum is, many might not want to participate at all.
The reason I have not taken Legal action is the fact that my husband's health is my top priority. And I do not think it would be wise for us to recall all of this again. It might evoke painful memories and feelings.
This was a very scary experience. My husband had to stop working and was put on anti-psychotic medication. The financial strain made it necessary to sell things we owned, such as handed down family antiques, just to make it.
I just want others to know there is risk involved in participating in large group awareness training like Landmark.